Writer Anon sent in this plea from the heart: I belong to an online writing group and one
of the other writers in the group read the opening of my novel and said it was
a load of cliché-ridden tripe with emotionless cardboard cut-out characters,
rubbish dialogue and unrealistic settings. He said I should give up because I’m
never going to make it as a writer. I’m scared he might be right. Would you
read my opening chapters and tell me if I should quit?
No, I’m afraid I don’t have the time to read and comment on
your writing, but even if I did have time, I would never advise anyone to give
up on their dreams. What I can do is give you some pointers on the aspects your
writing group peer has highlighted.
Firstly, the problem with clichés is that all too often they
sum up exactly what we want to say, which is how they became clichés. When any
currently well-known phrase was first written it wasn’t a cliché. A writer sat
down and thought of an original way to express something – and it worked so
well that others used it until it became a cliché. Your job as a writer is to
find new phrases to express your thoughts and emotions, rather than using the
words of others.
Moving on to the characters, unless you know and believe in
your characters as real people, they will come across as one-dimensional and
cardboard to your readers. You need to know everything about them – what’s
their background? What drives them? What do they want? What do they fear? You have to know them so
well that you instinctively know how they would react both physically and
emotionally in any given situation.
Show their emotions through their actions and dialogue.
Don’t tell your readers the characters are upset, angry, happy, sad or any
other emotion, show them! Let the characters throw things, pace up and down,
punch someone, yell, scatter flowers at a lover’s feet – in other words, have
them react on the page.
Put yourself firmly in a character’s head. Become that
person while writing – how would the character feel? In each scene and plot
twist, what would he or she do and say? If you know the character as well as
you should, the responses will enhance the characterisation.
The character’s personality should shine through in the
dialogue; this will bring a character to life far more than any amount of
description. So how do you get the dialogue to flow? One easy way is to imagine
each scene in your mind and then become the character. Act it out in your head.
Write the dialogue you can ‘hear’ your characters speaking. Afterwards, read it
out loud. Does it sound credible? Does it sound like people talking, or is it
stilted?
Whatever your character says should fit his or her
background and education level. Use dialect to show where the character comes
from, but don’t overdo it. If a reader has to stop every five minutes to try to
figure out what someone is saying, they’ll soon lose interest.
One thing to be wary of is using dialogue to tell your
readers things that the characters themselves would already know. This is known as ‘As You Know,
George’ dialogue. Where the dialogue sounds false, you need to find another way
of imparting information to the reader.
So, now that we’ve covered clichés, characters and dialogue,
that only leaves settings. The three Ss are your friend here. Sight, sound and
smell. If you can introduce these three aspects into your writing the setting
will come to life for the reader. You have to become the eyes, ears and nose of
your readers, but this (in my opinion) is one of those areas where less is
more. Don’t overdo the descriptive passages. Often small touches bring settings
to life – in a ghost story, for example, the whisper of a chill breeze blowing
out a candle in a windowless room, with the scent of hot wax hanging in the
air, sets the scene for fear much better than saying the house was haunted.
I hope the above helps with the issues raised by person in
your writing group. Please don’t give up, because clearly you care enough about
being a writer to have written to me and no one has the right to take away
another’s dreams.
Critique Service for Writers
Flash 500 Flash Fiction Competition
Flash 500 Humour Verse Competition
I can't fault Lorraine's advice. What I can say is that you should learn to shut your ears to online reviewers like that. Criticism should be constructive.
ReplyDeleteSome years ago I belonged to an online group in which it was impossible to get past Chapter One because everyone shouted different opinions on each redraft. In the end I ignored them all and dropped out of the group. I'm not saying their ideas ere wrong, and they certainly were not as destructive as the example you've encountered. I simply elected to go my way. Result: my 6th novel is due out next week.
Never give up on your dreams.
Thanks for posting, David. I agree, criticism should be constructive, but all too often it's the destructive comments that stay with us. I hope the writer doesn't give up. It broke my heart when I read the email.
ReplyDelete